My brother decided to use my bathroom and that was fine, but five minutes later I hear singing and he’s singing to the tune of “What’s This” for the Nightmare Before Christmas about various products I keep in the bathroom.
“What’s this, what’s this?
There’s products everywhere.
I think it goes in hair.”
the size of your thighs, or your waist, doesn’t matter
its the size of your bank account that we really care about
The human body has 7 trillion nerves and some people manage to get on every single fucking one of them
when McGonagall finds out that Ginny is pregnant, and that the Weasley and Potter bloodlines will converge, she marks on her calender the day the child will turn 11 and that is the day she retires
my car broke down on the highway the other day but i got to watch a really nice sunset while i waited for the tow truck
This deadass the funniest tweet ever.
This is what my husband and I purchased at the grocery store the other day.
We don’t have kids.
We are adults. We pay bills.
And drink water from a whale.
Draw me like one of your French girls
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